god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Randomize
