Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
