Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
