he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize