so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
