He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
