so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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