I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize