# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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