Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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