This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
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I licked your asshole in confidence.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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