After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
