Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
