I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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