Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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