All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
