She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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