I seem to have left my pride at pride
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
You're breaking my sexual little heart
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize