How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
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