My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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