did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
