And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
