This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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