dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
