Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Randomize