Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
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