I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
