I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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