Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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