I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize