Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
