it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize