HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
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