I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
