some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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