dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
