plz talk dirty to me
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize