I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize