It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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