I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
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