Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
