obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
