A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize