I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
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