he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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