go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
