So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Randomize