I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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