the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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