i just had sex bonerless
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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