You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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