I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
