with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
